Zen Baby

Every night my three-year-old, Bennett, ends the day with a snuggle and a talk in bed. We discuss the events of the day and go over this highs and lows. Every night his high is “playing soccer” and his low is “playing with Magna-tiles.” He doesn't quite understand these concepts -- he loves Magna-tiles and doesn’t always play soccer -- so the other night I attempted to dig into his answers.

Really, I asked, what was your favorite thing that you did today? He insisted that it was playing soccer, although he hadn’t touched a soccer ball all day.

And what was your least favorite thing? I asked. Did you have any problems, or did anything bother you today?

"Nope."

Slightly incredulous, I pressed on. "Do you like your new preschool class? Does anything bother you there?"

He considered the questions.

"No" he said slowly but firmly. He remained pensive and explained his answer with some supporting data.

"There are no lions. No bees. No tigers."

And there you have it. For Bennett, it’s a good day when you can kick around a ball, or at least imagine that you did. And his education is satisfactory as long as he isn’t painfully stung or mauled by a wild animal.

When you look at things like Bennett does, chances are that life is good. He doesn't ask much, and is often rewarded when reality exceeds his expectations.

There is empirical data to support this theory. According to the leading scientific survey on happiness, Denmark consistently ranks as the happiest nation in the world. They may be smoke, drink, and live in a marginal climate, but Danes are remarkably happy. After further study, researchers have concluded that this is at least partially the result of low expectations.

"What we basically figured out that although the Danes were very happy with their life, when we looked at their expectations they were pretty modest," he says.

By having low expectations, one is rarely disappointed.

It may be rainy, for example, but it isn't flooding. I might be poor, but I'm not destitute. I may have a terrible rash, but it isn't flesh eating bacteria. Perhaps Monty Python said it best; it pays to look on the bright side of life.

Seems to be working for Bennett. No lions, no bees, no tigers, and he's happy as a clam.